Community Articles
Go to Site Index See "Community Articles" main page
General News · 21st January 2018
CCHA Family Support - Desta
Parents and caregivers of children 0-18 are invited to join an upcoming eight-session parenting series.

Each of the eight-sessions will include a video presentation by internationally renowned author of Hold on to Your Kids, Gordon Neufeld, followed by facilitated discussion with Dayna Davis.

In Vancouver, this course costs $200 or more. The CCHA Family Support Program is pleased to be able to offer this program for FREE on Cortes Island, thanks to Dayna offering her time by donation and some funding from Success By Six. Please join us for as many sessions as you are able.

Time: 10am - 12noon

Dates: Saturdays
Jan 20 and Jan 27
Feb 3 and Feb 24
March 3 and Mar 10
April 21 and April 28

Fees: By donation.

Childcare: By donation, please pre-register.

Location: Manson’s Hall

More Info: cortesfamily.ca

Inquiries & Registration: cortesfscgmail.com

--------------

More background info:

Power To Parent…. (exerpt) by Gordon Neufeld

“We tend to take the power to parent for granted. There is little we can do with a child, however, that is not predisposed to attend to us, to look up to us, to depend upon us, to ask for help, to take the cues from us or to want to be good for us. These inclinations are not inherent in a child`s personality nor the result of skilled parenting. Rather, they are the fruit of a good working attachment to the parent.
When the attachment is weak or lacking, these predispositions will be missing in a child. When this is the case, parents are rendered impotent and parenting becomes difficult, contrived and unnatural. Parental impotence is becoming a common affliction but rarely is it recognized for what it is. We are more likely to assume that we lack the necessary skill or that we have a difficult child. The most instinctive reaction when lacking natural power is to become more forceful. Unfortunately, applying leverage such as sanctions and separation to coerce a child into compliance will not only provoke resistance but also damage the very relationship that empowers us. Sadly, such is the state of parenting today. Only when we realize our true source of power will we do everything in our power to safeguard it. Unless we have our children`s hearts, we will be unable to fulfill our parental responsibilities. Once we have our children`s hearts, we need to hold on to them until our task is done.
The secret of the power to parent lies in children being in right relationship to their parents. The more difficult the child or the problems, the more this is true. It is this very relationship that is being eroded by cultural chaos, by competing attachments to peers, and by parenting practices that interfere with the development of attachment. To compensate for the loss of cultural wisdom we must become conscious of attachment and then parent with attachment in mind. The only salvation for parenting that is truly natural and intuitive is to work at attachment and let attachment work for us.
Today`s parents are not only shy of power but power shy. Power has become a dirty word, undoubtedly because so many of us have experienced its abuse. Yet the most important responsibilities on earth are impossible to fulfill without the power to do the job. And when we don`t have the natural power required to parent, we are tempted to resort to forcefulness and manipulation, as is the growing trend among many parents today. Examples of such coercive practices include the use of time-outs and the tendency to use what children care most about against them (often euphemized as consequences and sanctions). The kind of power that arises spontaneously out of a correctly aligned attachment relationship enables parents to be highly effective without needing to be punitive or coercive. We need to overcome our aversion to power in order to assume our rightful position in our children`s lives. The kind of power that should be eschewed is power devoid of corresponding responsibility.”

----------------

Original January 13 post.

Parents and caregivers of children 0-18 are invited to join an upcoming eight-session parenting series. This course delivers the best that developmental science has to offer to those who matter most in the lives of children – parents and those who support them.

The Vital Connection is the first of a three-part Power To Parent series designed by developmental psychologist Gordon Neufeld (Hold Onto Your Kids) as core material for understanding the parent child relationship. Each of the eight-sessions will include a video presentation by Gordon Neufeld, followed by facilitated discussion with Dayna Davis.

The goal of this material is to restore parents to their natural intuition and support them to work in tandem with innate developmental processes. One of the foundational ideas of the course is that our “power to parent” lies in a well-established working attachment between child and parent. All insights into “what to do” with the child are seen through the lenses of development and right relationship.

The basic attachment and developmental needs of children are uncovered so parents can become the answer to these needs. Challenging problems are explained in such a way that root problems can be addressed.

Some of the many topics addressed include:
*dealing with resistance and oppositionality in children
*addressing the roots of aggression
*preventing being replaced by competing attachments
*disciplining in ways that do not divide
*addressing separation problems and anxieties
*raising children who are capable of deep and fulfilling relationships
*dealing with kids who seek to dominate instead of depend on their parents

The Power to Parent series had its beginnings in a parent discussion group that grew out of popular demand from young parents who took Dr. Neufeld`s university courses on developmental psychology and parent-child relations. It gradually evolved into an eight-session evening course called Making Sense of Kids that was in high demand by parents and professionals in the Vancouver area for many years. Because of Dr. Neufeld`s widespread international reputation, pressure mounted to film the course and make it available to others. The result is the Power to Parent series, a three-part trilogy of eight session courses.

Dayna Davis will facilitate the Vital Connection course on Cortes Island. Dayna is completing a facilitator-training program with The Neufeld Institute and will offer this course as part of her practicum requirements.

This series is offered in partnership with the Cortes Community Health Association Family Support Program with financial support from Success By Six.

Time: 10am - 12noon

Dates: Saturdays
Jan 20 and Jan 27
Feb 3 and Feb 24
March 3 and Mar 10
April 21 and April 28


Fees: By donation.

Childcare: By donation, please pre-register.

Location: Manson’s Hall 10 am – 12 noon

Inquiries & Registration: cortesfscgmail.com